The Holy Dip

According to the Hindu religion, a dip in the Ganges is supposed to free the soul and absolve one of all past sins. It is not like i have sinned... well i have...i mean... who hasn't? But thats not what i want to write about...

Anyway, there is something i want to purge myself from. So after days of pondering, i decided to take the 'Holy Dip'. What is it that i want to be free from? Well, I want to get rid of everything that takes the needle to the far end of the weighing scale (Just how far the needle goes is not open for discussion).

And so this morning i went to the pool and the first thing i let go of, were my apprehensions. The last time i went swimming, i was in the 9th grade and i could do five lengths at a stretch. Today, i managed to do two breadths and spent most of my time playing with Ayaan (who took to the water like a duckling:D).

After an hour of splashing around, he came out happy and i came out feeling happy, tired and lighter - mentally. And somewhere deep inside i felt a little proud of myself for shedding my inhibitions and just doing it. It may not be as Holy as the Ganges, but i believe that the little swimming pool in my building is just what my body and soul need.

Nature's Poetry

Flowers… I like flowers. They are beautiful symbols of life, fertility, and love. Its amazing how as an entity flowers are used to express different emotions. People buy bouquets to add color to their homes and offices, as a token of love to others, to brighten up an ailing person, to bring peace to a departed soul or just to feel better themselves.

The different colors and varied fragrances have a way of bringing about a smile on the recipients face. A smile like no other, a mix of contentment as they breathe in nature’s potion of life and pure visual pleasure at the array of colors. It is also the thought that someone carefully picked and matched a bunch of flowers with you in mind…like putting together a string of words to form a perfect sentence that expresses ones innermost feelings. A red rose if accepted is taken as a sign of reciprocated love, the sight of a discarded bouquet speaks of a broken heart. A flower truly is an expression of life which everybody celebrates in their own ways…

The delicate petals have inspired many a poet, and countless beauties have been compared with the daintiness of the blossoms… the softness of skin, the redness of lips, the tenderness of a touch, the sweetness of a kiss... the similes are unending. I do remember old hindi movies where a blossoming flower would imply the consummation of marriage. And in real life, a white rose is a sign of peace, yellow rose for friendship and red for love.. or so we believed in college. :)

My favorite flowers are orchids. They may not be fragrant, but when it comes to beauty...ah!! i love the quiet sensuality a single stem of orchids can infuse into a room. They seem to speak of unspoken promises. I feel happy when i see orchids.In fact if i were a flower i would bloom right then :)

"The Earth Laughs in Flowers"
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

3 - 0

Its not a scoreboard..thats my age. Two days ago i turned 30. And to make matters worse, Amit is out of town. I'd been dreading this day eversince i got to the wrong side of 25.. but i dint think id have to face it alone.

But here i was on the eve of my birthday, sitting alone on my couch thinking about the life gone by... the good, the bad and the oh-i-so-want-to-forget-it times. I missed my early twenties.. the fun, the carefreeness, the casualness, the parties, the adventures.. i miss how i used to look back then... things just seem worse when there is no icecream to accompany the thinking. I wont be able to tick the "Age 25-29" box while filling up forms anymore. Arrrgggh

And then the phone rang. Dimple, my best friend, called and sang "happy b'day". It was midnight and it felt good to hear her being silly on the phone (she also sent me flowers and chocolates later that day :)). A few more calls and i went to bed feeling not-so-bad. Early morning there was a very sweet message from a friend, the kinds that just brighten up your day...and hmmmm.. if its starting out like this, then it shouldnt be THAT bad.. isn't it. More calls, messages and emails came.. and suddenly..just like that... i realized.. i wasnt alone. old friends, new friends, school friends, work friends - i had company the whole day thru! people kept calling and messaging.. i wasn't alone. :)

A very dear friend, who knew about my thoughts on turning 30, wished me by saying "Apna, you are 20, with 10 years experience". He is a funny one. But what an uplifting way to look at it :) i was ready to take on the world right then.

This blog is the first step im taking towards rediscovering myself. I may not get my old waistline back.. but boy am i going to give getting "old" a fight! And as girish said.. 30s are much better than 20s not just because you are more mature but also because you are not that lost, you know who your real friends are..and you know what you really like.

I am liking this being 30 thing. Its been two days and i can still feel the positive energy around me..i love the friends i have. i love my little family. and when there is so much love.. things can only be good. I guess one has to be out of the twenties to see the world from this perspective. The view is good from here my friend.